(PV note) Kazim Uzunoglu, long time partner in riding, motorcycle tour guide extraordinaire offers a rationale for the six bikes in his garage. Is “one bike for all” the right approach to biking? Is the financial investment worth the return in pleasure? Do we have enough time and opportunities to ride more than one bike? How can one get familiar with bike’s – behaviour – action moving from one saddle to the other? These (and more) are the symptomatic questions that MBD raises.

I am suffering from the MBD (Multiple Bike Disorder) and it’s always an ongoing debate in my mind and also with my wife, writes Kazim.

Don’t get me wrong, my wife has no objections against multiple bikes, she even enjoys seeing them in the garage.  But the debate is a philosophical one.

These are the motorcycles I currently own at June 2020:

  • 2017 KTM 1290 Adventure R
  • 2010 KTM 690 SMC
  • 2019 Yamaha Xmax 250
  • 2014 Vespa Primavera 150
  • 1998 Ducati 916SPS
  • 1952 BMW R51/3

My friends, especially non-motorcycling friends, gulp when they see 6 bikes in the garage and ask the inevitable questions.  Why?  Can you ride them all?  My answer is usually a silly one to the why question.  Sometimes I say it is an art exhibition named “how to spend your money uselessly”, sometimes I use the typical “why not” answer.  Obviously non-motorcycle people can make no sense out of this disorder but if a good biker friend is interested in finding more about the motorcycles, we engage in a delightful conversation about what each bike means and can do to increase my utility.

I do believe that each bike has a separate intangible value that increases my utility in different aspects, ways and sensations.  After all, we buy goods and services to retrieve as much utility as we can from that purchase.  So I will try to delve into the utility I derive from my motorcycles.

KTM 1290 motorcycle

The KTM 1290 is my work horse.  I lead my tours riding this bike so it always has to be in good condition, reliable and safe.   As you know, I used to own a KTM 990 Adventure for about 10 years.  Even though I loved riding that motorcycle as well, it actually reached the end of its useful life for me in terms of an asset that I use while leading tours.  It had clocked more than 80,000 miles and it started giving me the unexplainable feeling that it could go wrong at any point in time.  Last thing I would want to do on a tour is to deal with my own bike’s problems.  So I sold the 990 with no feelings attached and upgraded to the 1290 which proved to be many light years ahead of the 990 in terms of technology, reliability and safety.  The best words that would describe the 1290 is solid and trustworthy.  The engine can crank out 160HP and it comes with all the technological gizmos that help the rider understand how to treat this power turbine.  In short, it is my perfect motorcycle for long distance riding and enjoying the scenery while riding and leading a group.

690 SMC motorcycle

The 690 SMC is basically a hooligan’s bike.  For a long time, it sported the most powerful mass produced single cylinder engine in a very light and nimble body.  My experience is that this bike brings out the dark hooligan side that I believe exists in every motorcyclist.  I know that I possess that mindset when I ride this bike.  The sound of the engine and the aftermarket Wings exhaust indistinctly tell me to do wheelies and stoppies and ride down a set of public stairs or break every law there is.  I will not go into details not to be embarrassed but I have to confess it makes me do things that cause me to question my identity and personality!  Riding this bike feels like a constant battle between “should” and “can”.  The utility I get out of this bike is that it vibrates my soul and flushes my hormones in the most immeasurable way all around my existence.

Xmax motorcycle

The Yamaha Xmax is an errand runner.  In my opinion, it is the perfect balance of engine, brakes, wind protection, efficiency, comfort, practicability, etc with the greatest price/performance ratio.  I live in the suburbs now so every now and then I have to ride on the highway along with the fast traffic and trucks to reach the busy and narrow streets of my city Istanbul.  The Xmax is extremely smooth and confidence-inspiring on the busy highways and yet when I reach downtown Istanbul, it is very agile, easy to park and ride around.  I even do our supermarket shopping with this bike, thanks to its plenty of storage space under the seat.  It may not be the best looking bike out there but obviously, this bike is very utilitarian and the utility I get out of it relates mostly to the degree of ease and efficiency of serving my needs.

Vespa motorcycle

The Vespa by Piaggio is more for shorter rides within smaller radiuses in our community.  Its unmistakably Italian styling makes it very desirable and the 150 cc engine is very smooth and down-to-earth. Yet its 11-inch wheels are not the best when you are riding/braking on wet streets or when you are cornering or riding over a pothole. But this small Italian bee means a lot to me because I have been able to ride it with my daughter since she was four years old (now seven) while she is standing in front of me, in the space between the seat and dashboard. She is growing taller now, so this riding method will not be possible soon but for the time being the pleasure she and I get on the Vespa means maximum utility for me.

Ducati Superbike

It’s hard to explain the utility of the Ducati 916 SPS.  It is a collector’s bike, #457 of the 1,058 manufactured in 1998. The SPS stands for “Sport Production Special” and the primary reason behind this bike being built was to homologate the new 996cc engine for Superbike competition but fortunately, the installation of the 996 engine into the 916 setups produced a bike that was described as “legendary”, “astonishingly good” and “a true superbike”.  This motorcycle is very often included in the “best motorcycle ever” lists compiled by magazines or other authorities.  If I were to pick one word to describe this motorcycle, I think I would go for “sexy”.  Stunning looks aside, riding this motorcycle feels like the ultimate sensation of being one – merging with the motorcycle that we always talk about when riding motorcycles.  The motorcycle feels like it reads your mind before you even put it into action so leaning and going around curves give the rider a totally unprecedented feeling of oneness.  Add on top the unparalleled symphonic sound of the engine, dry clutch and the Termignoni pipes as the icing on the cake and the unique utility from this motorcycle can only be explained as a delightful attack on all the senses.

68 year old BMW Motorcycle

The 68-year old BMW is another story in itself.  I believe the biggest utility comes from the plain fact that the bike can still run and stop, well, with careful planning about how to stop and when to stop.  It inevitably evokes a feeling of respect for the old and pure technology and its creators who were passionate about motorcycles.  In addition, the classic puritan looks of the BMW give it a timeless esthetic.  Sometimes I don’t even need to ride this black beauty.  Looking at the motorcycle and listening to the engine and its mechanical overtures after a few kicks on the kick-start are enough to get the maximum yield from my utility curve over this one.    I hope to increase my utility from this motorcycle by learning how to do essential maintenance work on its engine and hopefully carburettors in the near future.

Therefore, I still cannot boil my list down to “The One Bike to Rule Them All”.  It also feels as if I don’t yet have hands and eyes on such a bike and I can’t be sure if I ever will.  I have ridden many different motorcycles and I have to confess I have liked them all despite their differences.  So instead of one bike to rule them all, I guess I need to talk about the transcendental feelings that rule all feelings when we are riding:  the sensation of freedom, feeling of satisfaction and the rational awareness of the physical parts that come together to evoke these feelings.

Kaz Uzunoglu

(originally published at https://stevelarsen.net/a-response-to-one-bike-to-rule-them-all/)

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